DES-MOND THE MOON BEAR
How did I get here
The dangers of the bear zone aren’t nearly as bad as they’re made out to be. I haven’t been attacked by a bear in weeks.
Even outside the atmosphere, there’s a high risk. Bears really are impressive.
This is all joke and fun until you realize you live in the green region (which I do)
So, on average, a high chance of being attacked by a bear in the Sol system.
This is for the solar bear. Now check the polar bear.
Easily avoided if you stay out of gay bars.
Why isn’t this given out at national parks? Do they want bear attacks?
Most national parks are controlled by the bear mafia
The chances of getting attacked by a bear in the pink zone are low, but never zero.
Is that why it is called the Goldilocks Zone?
You are forgetting one thing… space bears…. They are a very real threat.
You joke, but after cosmonaut Alexi Leonov complained about the possibility of a bear attack, the TP-82 shotgun was standard issue on Russian spacecraft for decades.
Kind of makes sense when you think about them landing back on earth and maybe having to fight off something before the vessel can be recovered
Water bears?