i thought I was getting better, but I’m falling apart. I feel like a clown, I interact with people, they laugh and then turn their backs. At the end of the day I’m back here, alone, and I’m so sick.
i thought I was getting better, but I’m falling apart. I feel like a clown, I interact with people, they laugh and then turn their backs. At the end of the day I’m back here, alone, and I’m so sick.
being alone has some down sides, but also a lot of up sides. you’re more independent. you can do whatever you want whenever you want.
btw, do you have to interact with people for your job or are you like forcing some sort of interaction?
do they laugh about your jokes or did you say something emberassing? did they laugh out of disrespect or irritation?
For job that takes all my day,. They laugh like anyone laugh at a movie knowing that do not matter as soon is finished. This is the feeling to not be human, to do not matter to others who haves better life and in me see nothing.
I feel this comment. The best advice I can offer is that your time is the most valuable resource, so you should spend it wisely. Use this time to cultivate a body and mind you are comfortable in as this will project onto others a positive energy that helps you and others around you feel happy.
For me, this started with finding hobbies I enjoy and pushing myself to new limits in those hobbies. Also, since I have always been competitive, I use this energy to help others also succeed.
Good luck on your journey towards enlightenment.
That is not nice. Maybe you can look for a job with better people or less work hours, so you can make friends with people at a bar or so