Edit: while I’m at it, does anyone know what I should do when I’m waiting for a coincidence/adventure to happen, but it never comes? I can’t really go outside and arrange for it to happen because I don’t know what I’m looking for.
I don’t know who originally said it, but “Everything in moderation, including moderation.” That is, it’s okay to go overboard on something as long as that’s an exception, not a norm. Want to eat a whole carton of ice cream? It’s not going to kill you if you do it, as long as you don’t do it every weekend. Enjoy stuff, don’t be excessive generally, but the rare occasion is just fine.
Note: there are, of course, exceptions. You probably don’t want to try even a little black tar heroin unless you’re okay with the risk of becoming an addict.
I’ve heard that quote attributed to Charles Bukowski. No idea if true though
“Never half-ass two things. Whole-ass one thing.” -Ron Swanson
“I have the right to wipe my ass with a pinecone, but that doesn’t mean it’s the right thing to do.”
“Necessary? Is it necessary that I drink my own urine? No! I do it because it’s sterile and I enjoy the taste!”
Meaning: It doesn’t matter if it’s necessary, you should still do things because you enjoy doing it.
dodge duck dip dive and dodge
“You’re imagining everyone in this story way more attractive than they actually were.”
- some reddit guy“No good deed goes unpunished.”
Don’t avoid being good to others, as this truism suggests, just ensure you’re being good to yourself as well.
I’ve heard this truism my whole life, and glibly repeated it myself at least a few times. But we must acknowledge that it expresses a morally defeatist attitude that poisons the person who actually lives by it.
Instead you can reconcile kindness by being more observant. Some “good deeds” aren’t actually that good, since their extended effects amount to an unkindness to yourself or those you love.
For example, let’s say someone asks you to donate to a just cause, or loan them some money in a difficult time. If doing so means your family goes hungry or can’t afford clothes, it might not be such a good deed after all.
More subtle examples involve your time, such as helping someone by staying late at work, or spending hours listening to someone who really should get professional help instead.
Ultimately, it’s not true that “no good deed goes unpunished,” but even if it were, it doesn’t matter, because helping people is its own reward.
you meant “bad deed” ?
Nope.
Nearly every single time in my life that I have expended a significant or even massive amount of time, money, attention, intellectual or emotional capacity toward someone, solved their problems for them, it has been taken for granted, become expected, never reciprocated, and most of the people I helped went on to rope me into situations where I was even more on the hook, or they’d abuse me verbally or physically.
I finally concluded that none of the idiots in my life actually cared about me at all and just left.
Hey, if all the idiots left I’d say that’s a win.
that sad. now I understand what this quote means :(
Nope. That’s the (sad) joke of it.
Be angry at the sun for setting If these things anger you.
-Robinson Jeffers
don’t get angry on things that are out of your control.
This is a good one. People around me get angry about the stupidest things.
Life’s a bitch and then you die, that’s why we get high 'Cause you never know when you’re gonna go
Self explanatory
sometimes people will really fuckin hurt you and you won’t ever get an apology
Sometimes you’ll never know why, sometimes you will, but you still won’t get why.
The true mind can weather all the lies and illusions without being lost. The true heart can touch the poison of hatred without being harmed.
-Badass Lion Turtle
I neither have true mind nor true heart :(
Building self esteem requires esteemable acts.
“The best thing you can do as you grow older is to do it gracefully.”
“We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.”
ETA, same thing a different way: “That’s the thing. I don’t think I believe in ‘deep down’. I kind of think all you are is just the things that you do.”
I like this. What are each of the quotes from?
Pretty sure the second one is from Bojack horseman
The first one is from Kurt Vonnegut’s Mother Night, which is the story of the American Nazi propagandist, Howard Campbell, who briefly appears in the more well-known book, Slaughterhouse Five. The second is from the show BoJack Horseman, specifically episode 12 of the first season.
Always have an exit plan.
Not sure it’s really a quote, so maybe it doesn’t count … but it’s such common wisdom that it probably should count.
I never really appreciated it until I went through something where the wisdom of it would have made the difference. The slightly more precise version, IMO, is that whenever you’re in a position where something beyond your control can have a substantial influence on the outcome, you need an exit plan before you commit to that position, where that plan includes the definition of the conditions which trigger both the preparation of the execution of the plan and the time to actually exit.
The whole idea is to be prepared to not get fucked by other people or bad luck. And half of the benefit of having the plan is in the perspective it gives you. Instead of having Stockholm syndrome or suffering from the sunk cost fallacy, you naturally assess your situation as the set of trade offs that it is and more naturally perceive the toxic people that are essentially stuck in their worlds and either hold others back or propagate the culture that holds others back.
Make sure you have the plan, including the trigger conditions, formulated ahead of time, and regularly think back on the plan as you’re going along, adjusting or reassessing as necessary.
Can confirm. I was an employee at a pizza place - and thus allowed to use the staff exit - for just one night.
Exit was used.
This is game-changingly good advice. I just wish it was easier to come up with exit plans. I have often found myself stuck in situations where there was no clear or realizable exit plan opportunity, which meant I wasted a lot of time being stuck in the Stockholm syndrome situation, and resenting it.
“Everything you want in life has teeth”.
It means no matter what you think you want that’ll surely make you perfectly happy, it’ll never quite be what you want.
