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  • Quirky_Lab3298@alien.topBEnglish
    1·
    11 months ago

    I don’t know if I am normal but i would much prefer someone to address a problem they have with me directly or to be confrontational if they felt something was wrong, but, this year I keep encountering situations where people are saying one thing to my face but harboring a different set of feelings when i am not around. I don’t know if this is a ‘me’ problem, like perhaps people are afraid of confrontation with me because I am a strong personality, or maybe its just the norm for people to be conflict avoidant and I am being unrealistic by expecting people to be direct with how they feel. Sorry for the rant, but like 5 different social situations have happened this year that make me feel like people either just don’t respect me enough to be honest about their feelings, or maybe that is just my ego and i should stop taking it personally.

    • lemonlixks@alien.topBEnglish
      1·
      11 months ago

      Are you able to have this conversation with them? If you’re worried about them being intimidated or whatever, you could try to approach the situation with a lot of kindness and calmness, even if the situation itself is not necessarily warranting that from you. Generally it’s much easier for people to not be confrontational, which can suck because people then just harbour bad feelings instead of resolving them. I hope you’re keeping well mate.

    • Casual-Capybara@alien.topBEnglish
      1·
      11 months ago

      It’s Friday so you could have posted on the Freetalk Friday post haha

      In response to what you wrote, it’s difficult to say without knowing you and the other people. Perhaps they are conflict avoiding, perhaps you seem intimidating or perhaps you could somehow communicate better in the sense that you might pick up signals there is a disconnect between what people say and feel. Could be cultural even.